It used to be that I was almost a stranger to my son.
I realised that throughout his first year of his 2 and a half-year life, my son would not feel secure unless his mother was there by his side... It wouldn't even matter if I was around or not... it simply did not make any difference to him.
Things got slightly better the next year, but the fact of the matter was that it was nice if Daddy was around, but it wouldn't make too much of a difference, as long as Mummy was there. I may be slightly exaggerating there, but that is how it felt... I would go to work, and 2-3 times a week, come back at night when he was asleep... and when I was home, I would be more interested in relaxing rather than playing with him. But of course I would make the effort if I was feeling up to it.
I realised that this pattern was not good for my relationship with my son... So I tried harder.
I popped back from work during lunch just to bring him out to IOI Mall, where we'd get an Iced Milo and some kaya balls, and sit down together and enjoy the food (of course he would be running around most of the time).
I took him to the playground and basketball court when I wanted to shoot some hoops, even at night after I had come back from work.
I took him for walks around the neighbourhood, yes, even at night after work, and talked with him while walking... even though I'm pretty sure he couldn't understand half of what I said.
I played with him at every opportunity I could, instead of just focusing on work (though that may be because the University holidays are just around the corner).
I talked with him as much as I could.
I tried hard...
And now, praise be to God, all that extra effort has paid off...
My son enjoys my company, and I his.
From this, I learnt that may of us take for granted that relationships between father and son come naturally, and that we do not have to work hard for them...
Boy, was I so wrong...
